FMLA for Caregivers: Taking Leave to Care for Elderly Parents
Your parent is in the hospital. Or needs surgery. Or has been diagnosed with a serious illness. You need to be there—but you also need your job. Can you take time off without losing your position?
The Family and Medical Leave Act (FMLA) may protect you. Here's what you need to know.
FMLA provides up to 12 weeks of unpaid, job-protected leave per year to care for a parent with a "serious health condition." Your job (or an equivalent one) must be held for you, and your health insurance continues.
Are You Eligible for FMLA?
You must meet ALL of these requirements:
1. Your Employer Is Covered
- Private employers with 50+ employees within 75 miles
- All public agencies (federal, state, local government)
- All public/private elementary and secondary schools
2. You've Worked There Long Enough
- At least 12 months total (doesn't have to be consecutive)
- At least 1,250 hours in the past 12 months (~24 hours/week)
3. Your Parent Has a "Serious Health Condition"
This includes:
- Hospital stays (inpatient care)
- Conditions requiring ongoing treatment
- Chronic conditions (diabetes, Alzheimer's, cancer)
- Conditions requiring multiple treatments
- Pregnancy and prenatal care
FMLA only covers caring for your parent (biological, adoptive, step, foster, or someone who raised you). It does NOT cover parents-in-law, grandparents, aunts, uncles, or siblings—unless your state has expanded family leave laws.
What FMLA Provides
- 12 weeks of leave per 12-month period
- Job protection: Your job (or equivalent) must be held
- Continued health insurance: Same terms as if you were working
- No retaliation: Illegal to fire or demote you for taking FMLA
What FMLA Does NOT Provide
- Pay: FMLA leave is unpaid (but you may use PTO)
- Coverage for in-laws: Only biological/legal parents
- Unlimited leave: Capped at 12 weeks per year
Ways to Use FMLA Leave
FMLA is flexible—you don't have to take all 12 weeks at once:
- Continuous leave: Take all 12 weeks in one block
- Intermittent leave: Take leave in separate blocks (days, weeks)
- Reduced schedule: Work fewer hours per day or week
For example, you could take every Friday off for months, or take 3 weeks now and save 9 weeks for later.
How to Request FMLA Leave
1Notify Your Employer
Give at least 30 days notice if the need is foreseeable (planned surgery). For emergencies, notify as soon as practicable.
2Submit a Formal Request
Your employer will provide FMLA paperwork. You don't have to mention FMLA by name—just explain you need leave for a family medical situation.
3Provide Medical Certification
Your employer can require certification from your parent's doctor confirming the serious health condition. You have 15 calendar days to provide it.
4Get Written Confirmation
Your employer must respond within 5 business days confirming your eligibility and rights.
Can You Get Paid During FMLA?
FMLA itself is unpaid, but you may have other options:
- Use your PTO: Vacation, sick time, personal days
- State paid leave: Some states have paid family leave programs (CA, NJ, NY, WA, MA, CT, OR, CO, MD, DE, MN, ME)
- Short-term disability: If you have a policy, it may cover some situations
- Employer policy: Some employers offer paid caregiver leave
Several states have their own family leave laws that may be more generous than federal FMLA—covering more employers, more family members, or providing paid leave. Check your state's labor department website.
What If Your Employer Denies FMLA?
- Get the denial in writing with the specific reason
- Review the reason: Is it legitimate (not eligible) or questionable?
- Escalate internally: Talk to HR or your manager's supervisor
- File a complaint: Contact the Department of Labor's Wage and Hour Division (1-866-487-9243)
- Consult an attorney: If you believe your rights were violated
Protecting Your Job
To ensure a smooth return:
- Keep all FMLA paperwork and communications
- Document your leave requests and approvals
- Stay in touch with your employer as required
- Return on the agreed date (or communicate changes)
- If you're not returned to your position, ask for explanation in writing
Planning for Extended Caregiving
12 weeks may not be enough. Consider:
- Using intermittent leave strategically to stretch the 12 weeks
- Arranging alternative care for when you're at work
- Exploring remote work options with your employer
- Looking into respite care and adult day programs
- Talking to your employer about extended unpaid leave
Care Coordination Binder
Keep track of your parent's medical info, appointments, and care needs—helpful for FMLA documentation.
Get the Binder